Overcoming Fear

Quoted from Zig Ziglar

Fear is the dark room where negatives are developed

Fear has been correctly identified with the acrostic False Evidence Appearing Real. The truth is that if we think something is to be feared, that perception becomes the cruelest form of reality.

A second-grade boy was overheard saying, "It's easy to be brave when you're not scared." By the same token, it's easy to talk about how to overcome fear when you have little to be afraid of. Fear is certainly real for some people and all of us face a fear of something - maybe it's  poverty, divorce, rejection, death, failure, speaking in public, or being laughed at.

How do we overcome fear? First, we must learn to examine our fears. Giving a speech is the number one fear in our country, according to Reader's Digest. (It's also a tremendous confidence-builder.) If that's your fear, ask yourself a few questions:

1) Why am I afraid to make a speech?
2) Is it because I'am afraid of being rejected?
3) If so, do I think I'll be rejected?
4) Do I believe what I'm about to say?
5) Is my speech worth giving?
6) Am I proud of the comments I'm about to make?

As you ask yourself these questions, the fear will begin to subside. It subsides because you have explored your subconscious mind with your questions and flushed out some of your fears.

My research indicates that only three people have died while making a speech. Since twelve billion people have lived and only three of them died making a speech, I'd say it's fairly safe thing to do. If you're a little nervous, consider this: You could lead a mule into a crowded room and he would be so calm that he would almost go to sleep standing up. A thoroughbred in the same situation would be as nervous as a cat. If you're a little nervous, just be grateful you're a thoroughbred - not a mule. So face those inner feelings, stand up, and speak with confidence.

Unquote.

If some adults have difficulty facing their fears, it will be the same for children.
Parents, if you notice that your child is facing some fears, instead of just telling him to be brave and faced it, try to understand their fears. Ask him to share with you what is it that he actually fear. Explore it with them. Encourage them to try out different ways to overcome it, while letting them know that you are supporting them.

Failure Is Critical to Success

Quoted from Zig Ziglar:

With dreams there's no need to go to dreamland via drugs and alcohol.

"You've got to learn to lose in order to win" sounds like strange advice, but the man who says it has earned over $300 million. Even in today's economy, that's a considerable sum of money. Here's the story.

In 1958 Frank and Dan Carney started a pizza parlor across from their family's grocery store. Their goal was to pay for their college educations.Nineteen years later, Frank Carney sold the 3100 outlet chain called "Pizza Hut" for $300 million.

Carney's advice to those starting out in business sounds strange, but he explains the concept this way: I've been involved in about fifty different business ventures and about fifteen of them were successful. That means I have about a thirty percent success average." The major point Frank makes is this: You need to be "at bat" if you ever expect to get a hit, and it's even more important to step back up to the plate after you strike out.

Carney says Pizza Hut was successful because he learned from his mistakes.For example, when Oklahoma City expansion effort failed, he realised the importance of location and decor. He learned from his mistake so that the future would be brighter. When sales declined in New York, he came up with the innovative idea of introducing thick crust, with substantial success. When regional pizza houses began to take part of the market share, Frank responded by introducing "Chicago-style pizza," and again success came his way. Factually, Carney failed many times but in each case he made those failures work for him.

Failure is an experience common to all of us.

Question: Will you let those failures work for you or against you? If you do as Frank Carney did, you will use your failures as learning experiences.
Unquote.

Some learning points:
1) Learn to lose in order to win
2) Realised the importance of location and decor.
3) Came up with the innovative idea.
4) Responded (take actions)
5) Made those failures work for you.
6) Failure is an experience common. 

We can teach ourselves and our children some of the learning points above. Don't give up because you fail once or twice. Thomas Edison had 1,000 tries to invent the light bulb. In other words, he failed a whopping 999 times before he reached success. Soon after Edison revealed his earth-shattering invention, a French reporter asked, “Mr. Edison, how did it feel to fail 999 times?” As the story goes, Thomas Edison just smiled and replied, “Young man, I have not failed 999 times. I have simply found 999 ways how not to create a light bulb.”

Today, many adults are not able to face failure. This started when they were young. Many parents expect their children to excel and do well, and protect them from failures or expect no failure from them. Hence, when these children become adults,  they may not have the tenacity to face failure.

Allow your child to fail. When he failed, guide him to overcome.